All my Peeps

August 30-The cogs are all falling into place….my chemo treatments start this week.  I have been waiting to get the ball rolling and now that I am beginning the venture down the big hill, I gotta tell you I am more than a little nervous, anxious and downright scared.  So now is where I want to hear how strong I am, what a fighter I can be, because I am feeling just a little bit small in the universe at this moment…..trying to see the glass as half filled, BUT I have the ???? dancing through my head as to the path we have charted is taking shape…..

The hugest obstacle I feel right now is the ultimate fail of my body….I am still trying to deny that this is all happening to me.  I am still trying to wake up from this nightmare, take the breath, that sigh of relief and realize that is was all one big scary ass dream—can’t do it, because here I am looking at the appointments, taking the meds and starting blogs for all the peeps in my life to follow while I disembark on a freakin’ unbelievable journey.

So, I now draw strength from all of you guys, because I am going to need every little bit you put out there.  I have a HUGE family in the Midwest—Cincinnati is not only home of the best 3 way chilis on earth, but also where I grew up.  Visited with most of my family just a few weeks ago, in fact, I was surrounded by my Mom and siblings and nieces and nephews when my diagnosis came in.  Let me tell you, we are an extremely diverse group and will hold nothing back, but I can always count on any of my Cincy fam to have my back at all times and at all costs, whether I want it or not!

And of course life would not exist as I know it without my main man, Randy and the 2 brightest stars in my eyes, Brian and Tommy—you guys keep me grounded and remind me too often that I really do need to let people help me in my time of need.  Elisa and Katie are my boys support in all ways and our nuclear family would be incomplete without you.  Monday night family dinners are something that doesn’t happen every week, but when it does it feels magical, first, that we were actually able to get everyone together and then that it is filled with loads of love and always, always riveting conversations and debates…….Tommy and Randy, hear that right?

I am already calling in my San Diego BFF’s to assist, though it really is hard for me….Mary, Joyce, Yvonne, I know if I ask you will be right there….and earlier this month, I got to meet up with my OLD friends, a group of girls that have been there for me since my teens—Mary, Cheri, Karen and Dottie—you guys have seen it all and our lives have intertwined for decades!!  A few weeks ago, we were viewing a meteor shower together on the roof at Cheri’s and it felt magical….swapping stories while we watch the stars, it doesn’t get much better than that!  And don’t even get me started on the Taster Tuesday gals—so I might still want to dress up and wear some killer heels, but it might have to be at Rock-n-pine on my patio instead of at Solare—are you game, Dana and Adie??? All the crazy fun folks I have met on my catamaran trips to the most beautiful spots on earth—Queenie Jeanine and Eli, I will make it to the cottage, because I need to draw strength from my Boston Strong peeps.

And let me not forget my Solare family, because that what you guys are—FAMILY—Even though after chemo starts I won’t be able to visit too much, I know you all have my back, whether it be making yummy dinners that Randy brings home or ensuring the most important men in my life are doing OK—I can count on all of you and that makes things easier for me!  Love you all to the moon and back….

So, as I get ready for Chemo this Thursday, I am more than grateful for all the peeps that have crossed my path and made life just a wee bit more interesting, and I will draw strength from you, because I believe I am going to need it—so a big thank you in advance for all that you do to help us navigate this ever crazy path that my journey has taken.  Big hugs and kisses….that will definitely be a tough one to give up, cause hugging + kissing + chemo do not mix, and know that without all my peeps this would just be an impossible task, so I am so glad you have my back!